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PM Dunne's avatar

I think it was a formatting issue. The heading for whisper got pushed down or something. Anyway I enjoyed your (metaphysical?) poems--there’s inquiry, sonic texture, the pacing is on point. Very cool. Have you considered tweaking the form?

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Melissa Smith's avatar

Tweaking the form to get the whispers fic toward the top instead of bottom? Or to make the poems different interesting formatting? I just put the story at the bottom haha, named the post after the story but threw in some random poems because i dont like just posting one poem alone, i kinda collage them into a piece together when i have a few written

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Benno's avatar

I really like the constant interplay between images and poetry that you've used, it gives it a sort of scrapbook diary that makes it feel way more intimate and personal. Especially liked the lines:

among abandoned gods and gardens

All my love’s been satire

/ Break breath.

Thanks for sharing!

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Melissa Smith's avatar

I do pretty much treat these poems like a visual diary in a way, mini mood boards 😆

Thank you! 🙏🏽

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Miguel Gaspar's avatar

"It's gonna be ok...

...will it? "

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Melissa Smith's avatar

Always will in the end 🫶🏼 thanks for reading

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Michael Edward's avatar

I liked this whole piece. But this bit really stood out for me:

“Typing twenty messages, unsent

Picking all the wrong battles

While you stopped fighting long ago

I’m at war with it all

The whole goddamn world

Looking for heaven in strangers

Finding myself in the black

Hurrying down the steps of hell”

— amazing! :)

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Melissa Smith's avatar

Thank youuu 😄 can’t get away from the sad girl writing its blood deep 😆

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Michael Edward's avatar

Hahaha that’s alright. Let it out. Nothing wrong with some sad girl/boy writing. :)

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Gabby's avatar

Damn this is good. I love your writing, it’s so beautiful. I usually don’t read poetry but I want to read more of yours

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Melissa Smith's avatar

Thank you 🙇🏻‍♀️ I wanna write short stories lol and I’m working on two painstakingly slowly idk why I keep writing poems but they’re flowing so I’m going with it

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Monica Hatton's avatar

😍

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Nathaniel Dansereau's avatar

Who painted that thin man with the tiny head?

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Melissa Smith's avatar

Oswaldo Guayasamin is the artist!

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